The outcome of massive success scares you. You control that by playing small and sabotaging your efforts. You don't sabotage yourself intentionally or consciously but more subconsciously and with your thoughts. You are more than capable to achieve success but huge success scares you. You control your outcome by controlling your failure. You can easily control that as that is comfortable and familiar. What you don't feel confident you can control is success. What might happen to you if you succeed? Umm...that is unknown; totally unknown and unfamiliar. Failure on the other hand is comfortable and familar and somewhat safe. It is more predictable and keeps you in a place of the familiar. And as long as you can dwell on what's wrong, you can't take the necessary steps to do what you need to do to succeed. If you focused on success and setting up your life to be successful, doors would open to you beyond your wildest dreams, and you won't let that happen. You would rather live in the life of the familiar. You can choose to remain in control and keep doing what you are doing or you can let go and turn it over to use for help.